The Joker:

This won’t be a long story.

8/1/2019, right at 1 A.M. in the morning a woman calls dispatch screaming that a man broke into her home carrying a gun. The Dispatcher who is a top notch professional called in “All Units”. The boys in blue got there faster than you can find a dope dealer in Harlan. The Big Quillie (Officer Joel Quillen) and The Night Stalker busted in through the back door in order to flush the Prick (Did I say that?), I mean culprit out. It worked like a charm. The burgler ran out the front door like he was fleeing from Hell’s minions (In a way he was), running right into Sgt. Josh Burchett (Bust Em) and K-9 Officer H. Johnson (Harvey) and Atlas (Bah Bah) where he was arrested “without further incident” which is a nice way of saying that Bah Bah didn’t get to tear his arms off.

Stephen Dozier of Baxter Kentucky (Harlan County) was taken down to the Pineville Lay Over for Harlan County Numbnuts and charged with “Burglary” and placed under a 10K “Cash” Bond. Mr. Dozier will also be charged with Possession of a Fire Arm by a convicted felon.

It appears that Mr. Dozier is used to seeing the friendly confines of a jail cell. Up in his neck of the woods (Harlan County), his past charges include but are not limited to:

Assault X1
Criminal Trespass X1
Terroristic Threatening X1
Bench Warrant X4
Possession of Meth X1
Possession of Synthetic Drugs X1

Mr. Dozier is a very lucky individual. If Bah Bah got a chance at him he’d be in the hospital instead of the jail. Also, if he tried this stunt in the homes of a few I know in the Boro, they’d have called the coroner and not the Police.

Great Job by The Big Quillie, The Night Stalker, Bust Em Burchett, Harvey, The Dispatcher And “Bah Bah”. Thank God they were there for the lady. Taking down wacked out criminals with guns in the middle of the night ain’t for sissys. These brave men and Dog deserve our utmost respect.

Go Team Middlesboro!!!

P.S. Below is a copy of the press release.

Press Release:

On 08/01/2019 at 1:01 AM Officers of the Middlesboro Police Department responded to a residence near the Ford’s Woods area in response to a 911 call from a homeowner of a home invasion. The homeowner reported that an unknown male had broken into the residence armed with a handgun and that he was still inside the residence. As Middlesboro Police offers Joel Quillen and Nick Capps forced entry into the rear of the residence to confront the male he tried to flee out of the front of the residence where he was met by Sgt. Josh Burchett , K-9 Officer Harvey Johnson and K-9 Atlas. The male was quickly arrested without further incident. The male was identified as 26-year old Stephen Dozier of Baxter Kentucky. Dozier’s vehicle was located approximately 2 blocks away from the residence. He was lodged in the Bell County Detention Center and charged with Burglary 1st Degree. Other charges are pending.




“The following article is based on open and public records from the Middlesboro Police Department as well as The Bell County Detention Center Website and is written in the style of satire as an opinion piece not associated or based on the opinions of The Polygraph News, Incorporated—it’s founders, owners or staff.”