The Joker:

On July 12, 2019 just before 6 pm, Sargent Barry Cowen (The Big Bear) made a traffic stop on a red Chevy truck with Tennessee tags travelling north on US 25E. Naturally, The Big Bear is a bit suspicious of Big Orange tags coming through the Boro. Consent was given to search the vehicle, and the passenger, Mr. Jeffrey Lynn Thomas of Barbourville, Kentucky had a little meth on him. Mr. Thomas was taken down to the Pineville Center for Knox County Meth Users that drive through the Boro when The Big Bear is on duty, where he still resides under a $1500 “cash” bond. Breakfast Included.

On July 12, 2019 just after dark, Knox County Deputy Sheriff Carl Frith asked the MPD to serve a warrant. The dispatcher called the one no criminal wants to see . . . THE NIGHT STALKER. Out on 19th Street, Mr. Dustin N. Walters of Gray, Kentucky found himself face-to-face with a sure trip to jail. In the mountains, news travels fast, and Knox County is no different. Folks there know that after dark, the Boro is protected by the most feared lawman around. Mr. Walters put up no resistance.

At present, Mr. Walters is hanging out at the Pineville Bed and Breakfast for those with Knox County, Kentucky warrants that think they can hide in the Boro. Mr. Walters has a $5000 “cash” bond and is charged with theft.

I don’t know if the food is as good in the Knox County Detention Center as it is in the Bell County Jail, but I can tell you that when you visit the Ferguson Arms, you get booked in and a mugshot taken as well as a past history search available, not like relatives and friends in Knox County.

Sheriff Mike Smith and his crew up in Knox County do a pretty smart job of fighting crime and keeping the public informed via Face Book. I sure can’t say the same for the Barbourville Police Department and their social media presence (Last post June 6th. Before that May 20th).

Anyhow, The Boro has enough problems with the Big Orange Crime Wave that has invaded the city, Let us hope that the Knox County Kentucky criminal element hasn’t decided to move operations South.

Many thanks to The Big Bear and The Night Stalker, for keeping the citizens of The Boro Safe.

Criminals Beware.

Go Team Middlesboro!!!

“The following article is based on open and public records from the Middlesboro Police Department as well as The Bell County Detention Center Website and is written in the style of satire as an opinion piece not associated or based on the opinions of The Polygraph News, Incorporated—it’s founders, owners or staff.”